Rose

‘Rose’ and its introduction of a very new style of Who seems to me to have overdone the modernisation of the programme, seeming like a disturbing parallel to the Blairite transformation of Labour: slick, soundbite-ish and full of spin (i.e. the trailers and RTD’s almost Stalinist grip on the series’ protocol and commercial representation). But I suppose, like New Labour, New Who still inevitably retains at least some vague traces of its Old ideology: chiefly a central character who – give or take a bit of pugilism here and a bit of unsubstantiated gadgetry there – still stands for brain over brawn. But in this first episode, this wasn’t enough. Eccleston presented us with a – fresh or blustery – break with past interpretations of the role with his ordinariness of appearance and very contemporary, Joe average vernacular. Yes, he displayed welcome eccentricity and Troughtonesque impishness, especially regarding his waving “Hello” when Rose repeated his name to him as they walked down a street. Eccleston retains some of the alienness of Tom Baker too. However, whilst an essentially working-class style Doctor with a pronounced – nay, even exaggerated – Northern accent is arguably a belated evolution of the character from his more middle-class, dilettante past selves, it is at least ostensibly nothing new: McCoy, the last substantial TV Doctor, pioneered this with his blatant, consonant-trammelling Scottish accent. I say ostensibly as McCoy did not in turn play on this as some sort of subtle inverted-snobbishness when up against aliens with received pronunciation: his occasional stumbling on lines was more to do with his own peculiar style of speech which was arguably a slight impediment. Eccleston’s Doctor seems to revel in his regional accent to such an extent that his articulation sounds sometimes a little lazy and self-consciously t-dropping which to me seems pointless and – whether we woolly-headed liberals like it or not – almost implausible, especially for a Gallifreyan (and I used to suspend disbelief with Drax’s cockney accent in Armageddon Factor). We can only assume the ninth Doctor has spent much time up north before coming to London – although he has also apparently recently regenerated (“well, could have been worse”; “look at the ears” etc.), quite muddling considering the revelations of his web-tracer that he has appeared in photographs from various times and places in the past and future in this incarnation!). His retort to Rose that “most planets have a north” in no way explains his blatant regional accent does it? Are we to assume that Northerners on Gallifrey, by some strange quirk of parallel linguistic evolution, developed Salford accents? To me this is just whimsical and sloppy scripting. The need for his accent to be picked up on in the narrative invites these sorts of criticisms when no believable explanation is forthcoming – again it seems simply symptomatic of the terrestrialisation of the show, which is needless.

As for the Doctor’s ‘look’. Whilst the toning down of previously embarrassing costumes (Colin Baker’s in particular; hideously self-parodying question mark accoutrements etc.) into a battered black leather jacket is welcome, the low-cut v-neck t-shirt is a big mistake in my opinion: it just puts too much emphasis on Eccleston’s neck and doesn’t look right, especially when coupled with his ludicrously short crew cut – frankly he looks like a Navvy on a night out. Toning the Doctor’s clothes down was good, refusing to keep him in a ‘costume’ JNT-style was also good (as although each Doctor prior JNT had a look, they did frequently change clothes while retaining the look – Pertwee wore variously different coloured smoking jackets etc. – and this really detracted from the believability of the JNT Doctors). But a v-neck t-shirt!? That was quite simply slack and absurdly ‘casual’ of the costume designer – why not a jumper or a shirt?

For me the strongest element of ‘Rose’ was the internet character and his photographic revelations about the Doctor which could – and should – have been further developed throughout the series. Instead he is killed off by a Top Shop manikin masquerading as an Auton. The incidental music makes Keff McCullouch’s almost bearable by comparison. In true Doctor Who tradition – and in spite, this time, of sufficient money and technology to do it justice – the Nestene Consciousness was, for the third time in the series, insubstantially and unimpressively manifest! Other than the admittedly topical and polemical line from the Doctor about the Nestene liking the planet for its pollutants, no other explanation was given for the Auton’s third invasion. Whatever explanation might have been given was conveniently disguised in indecipherable alien gurgles which the Doctor chose not to translate for us (obviously he had yet to install the TARDIS’s new translating mechanism revealed in the next episode) and we were meant to piece together some sort of background story from his very worrying mention of ‘the war’ which he ‘fought in’. This climax was extremely disappointing and frankly unforgivable for a series famed for its tying up of loose ends in each story (bar one or two McCoy Sapphire and Steel-esque outings). In fact, ‘Rose’ has no story whatsoever and is largely like a 45 minute trailer. Where RTD does succeed is in the dialogue between Doctor and companion, which is, on the whole, pretty good. But characters cannot totally replace storyline. Even Unearthly Child managed to weave a story together, in the first ever episode alone!

Other criticisms: the inexcusable whimsy of the burping dustbin which would have inspired death threats in the JN-T days – this scene makes the sight of an old lady’s slipper peeping out from a Cleaner in Paradise Towers comparatively tame. Similarly pantomime-esque was the Doctor’s frantic struggle with the Auton arm while Rose blithely boiled the kettle in the foreground. His comment on a couple not lasting due to one being gay and one an alien while leafing through HEAT magazine was again needlessly contemporaneous and not even funny. Satire is good and welcome in the new series, polemic and political/social comment, but I hope cultural comment will not only be limited to the philistine popular sham whose protagonists try to convince themselves is ‘culture’, and which most people likely to watch Doctor Who desperately wish to switch off from. Isn’t that the point of escapism?

There seems to be a popular unanimity as to the near untouchable writing credentials of RTD. With exception to parts of the equally overly contemporaneous and highly camp Casanova, I can only ask, why? Not only was The Second Coming a very obvious sort of idea, it was, I felt, implausibly realised and actually very boring. Much as I was – and still am – an admirer of Eccleston’s outstanding acting talents (particularly in Jude and Our Friends in the North), I literally could not muster enough interest to finish watching the first episode of this 'acclaimed series', let alone tuning in for the second instalment. In my opinion, it was simply ordinary, when it could have been quite extraordinary given the theme. I have therefore, unlike most fans, been dreading the return of Doctor Who – as well as excitedly anticipating it on a purely superficial basis – and although I feel this Doctor has much potential, I am disappointed as to the weak writing of this first episode, the complete lack of any storyline (arguably for the first time ever in the show’s history) and a dramatically undermining attention to contemporary trendiness which is ultimately pervading and dogging RTD’s other TV output, Casanova. I feel RTD is imposing his own tastes too much and too early on, and that these tastes and stylistic trademarks of his are in essence geared towards two-dimensional, one-off viewing; a sort of gimmicky, ‘let’s not take things too seriously’ approach. Ring any bells from the past?

Another note is that I really think the new Who production team’s Stalinistic closed shop policy (i.e. not allowing any external scripts or ideas to be considered presently) will be the Achilees’ Heel of this reinvented programme: just look at the completely unimaginative episode titles for one – these writers need urgent help with their titles!!!

A few other moans: people keep talking of how unusual it is to have a feisty, independent-minded female assistant – so what was Ace then? The first non-RP Doctor – what about McCoy (and arguably even McGann with his slight Liverpudlian accent)? Later in the series: Daleks who fly! Does no one remember Remembrance? A new, bigger TARDIS set – the McGann one was bigger and far more interestingly designed (for what was admittedly an appalling film). A future story involving blue-faced zombies in dress of different periods emerging from smoke in the Second World War? Just a hint of Curse of Fenric there do you think?

But back to ‘Rose’ and my overall criticism: every single episode ever of Doctor Who before has been worthy of taping and re-watching at least three or four times over the years (even the clangers). I have decided on having watched Rose for a second time on video that it is not made for re-watching like the old stories: it simply doesn’t have enough meat to its threadbare script, there is nothing to get your teeth into or any subtexts to reinvestigate as in past stories (bar the internet man’s scene and the Doctor’s soliloquy about the Earth moving). Rose is still ultimately typical modern TV: superficial with pale flashes of depth here and there but not enough to warrant returning to after a second viewing. This is, sadly, the first Who story I can say this about, and I am not happy about that. I sincerely hope things improve and we finally get a story worthy of the canon.