As I write, ‘World War Three’ has already aired. I have not seen it, and cannot until Friday, when I will watch the video I’ve recorded. I do not know much about ‘World War Three’. I hope it is better than this (although I doubt it).

Pleasingly, reviewers on this site are beginning to tune in to what I have said since March 26, that Christopher Eccleston’s performance in the role of Doctor Who really isn’t very good at all. Throughout, the man has looked a bit like a secondary school level actor, occasionally struggling to deliver the most basic lines in a manner even slightly resembling convincing. Given his performances elsewhere, I can only assume that this is because Russell T Davis’ writing is forcing him to play it goofy and erratic – basically, to conform to Davis’ own twisted conception of what is ‘Doctorish’ – and he is unfamiliar with this. The BBC’s press release refers to this Doctor being ‘wise’, as well as ‘funny’, but the petulance (seen in his treatment of Mickey), arrogance (always ready to tell people to shut up, even Charles Dickens!) and most of all basic incompetence (‘cause, think about it, what does he actually do in this episode? Apart from walk into a trap – again – he shows off his mental brilliance by figuring out that the pig-like thing is, in fact, a pig! Well done, Doctor) of this incarnation makes it very hard for me to take it seriously.

Bizarrely, some people have said that he is the ‘best Doctor yet’. Those people are the ones who have gone into the new series simply adamant that nothing and no-one is going to spoil the experience for them, and insist that the sun shines out of RTD’s backside irrespective of the quality of the stories they are watching (they clearly also have never seen Tom Baker or Pat Troughton in the role). Well, fair play to them – they are clearly who Russell is writing this for (he is very similar, convinced that his view of the series is the best ever) – it must be really nice to enjoy it, and I bet they are happier in life than me! It’s just that one or two of the things that fans in various forums have said come across as holier-than-thou. Why shouldn’t my blisteringly negative interpretation of this series be as valuable as their positive one, without being labelled ‘anal’? I bet they hate ‘Time and the Rani’, or something, and don’t get grief for it. This is something that really annoys me!

To return to ‘Aliens of London’ (like the title, by the way). No, it is not Eccleston’s performance which ruined this episode for me. Here he puts the lid on it a bit, or perhaps I’m just getting used to him ( I heard the man himself say on BBC Radio 5 that in ‘Dalek’ he’s a very different Doctor to in the other ones – I certainly hope so). This time it was a combination of the scripting and the production that did it. Actually, despite my intense mistrust of Russell T Davies (which is founded in part on the universal insistence from the media, everyone at Doctor Who Magazine and most fans whose views I’ve read that he is the greatest writer, with the greatest credentials, in THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE!!!, and in part on his falling victim to ‘Tony’s cronies’ syndrome, hiring his old mates to do the Doctor Who job and presumably not considering other people and actors) I have never before been able to find much corroboration of it in the scripts themselves, but the farting aliens and totally unrealistic reaction of the military establishment to alien incursion (plus of course the supposed cream of British science not recognising a pig!) in this episode were enough this time around.

The production, however, though detailed and glossy, has so far been harmful to the show in the way that it is presented. The 45-minute episodes, obviously, are a problem, but they could work very well were the general ambience within them not so noisy, blurry and, well, orange. It’s like ‘The Claws of Axos’ in there! The lighting and look of the show do not meet expectations – my over-riding image of episode 1 is of the Doctor and Rose, grinning, walking though an orange smudge. The sound and editing are similarly bad, some dialogue and much sense lost in a welter of fast cuts and music. They should cart that digital video camera off down the scrap yard and start filming the series – and quieten it down a bit, for heaven’s sake! One thing it could certainly be accused of is possessing atmosphere: that, to me, is a bad thing. This week’s gastrically-tormented aliens are a case in point, being utterly ludicrous and unconvincing. Take, by contrast, the shot which ends the teaser in the previous episode, ‘The Unquiet Dead’, where the living corpse walks howling towards the viewer, venting light. That is excellent stuff on paper, and well directed, and more appropriate music and some decent lighting could have made it look good.

Oh dear, oh dear. So, where does this leave us? Well, in many ways, this is a new low for ‘Doctor Who’. This ‘anal’ fan here hates fart jokes, and thinks you don’t need them to tell a good alien invasion story – but of course his opinion is not cared for by The Powers That Be, being far too la-di-dah and Middle English (haven’t you heard? We all live in council estates now!) and old fashioned. It simply reeks of Old Fandom! However, there is no question that the show has been worse: Seasons 23 and 24, and even some Jon Pertwee and Tom Baker stories were worse than this. The acting (apart from Chris) is mostly ok, actually, and the scripting has been mostly fine given the enormous constraints. The reason this review has been so violently critical is that I feel betrayed, hurt and terribly disappointed by my beloved show. I was willing it to be amazing, and wonderful, and glorious, and for it to fly, fly like a bird, and to be majestic, and shining (to draw upon RTD’s column style!) I was convinced, totally convinced that it would be a masterpiece – even after ‘Rose’ I was willing to be convinced, and God, even ‘Rose’ was better than this. I feel really gutted with what we have now. I know, four episodes in and already judging! 80s-style anti-producer witch-hunts are not a road any of us want to go down again, I’m sure. But, to be honest… well, let me quote Russell’s own ‘Production Notes’ column in DWM: “But you promised us the Doctor!”; “Hate the Slitheen!”; and, most importantly, “RTD must go now!”.

D’oh!!!!

Well, erm...how did that happen?

I suppose I'll start off with the positive: I loved the fact that, for once, we saw the real world consequences of somebody leaving their life behind to travel with the Doctor. We got a glimpse of this in Survival, but to the best of my recollection, it's never been dealt with to this degree in the series before. Rose's disappearance also added some dimensions to the previously one-dimensional Jackie and Mickey characters. Mickey, in particular, came off much better than he did in Rose. Instead of being Stock Jerk Boyfriend A (see also: Billy Zane in Titanic), who exists just to make the hero look good, he came off as a real person. I also enjoyed the Doctor's refusal to call him anything other than Ricky. Also, the TARDIS crew were in top form, as usual, with Eccleston making a commanding and compelling Doctor and Piper as the first companion to truly represent the viewing audience since...gosh, probably Ian and Barbara.

The Spacehog didn't phase me. Its passing was oddly tragic, and as a visual gag, it fit in fine with the strange humour of things like the original Doctor Who and Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. The farting, while it did grate after a while, wasn't horrific, as it was a plot point rather than a cheap gag (although there certainly were other more subtle, less scatalogical ways to indicate that these aliens don't quite fit their adopted bodies). I do, however, question the wisdom of having two back-to-back episodes featuring distinct gaseous alien races taking human form, but since RTD seems to ignore the very existence of The Unquiet Dead in his script, I suppose I should too. It's only the best episode of the new series thus far, but considering Aliens of London essentially picks up where End of the World left off, in contemporary London, and the script makes zero mention of the events of The Unquiet Dead even obliquely, it seems to have been quietly buried (no pun intended!).

All of the episode's sins are quite forgivable until the very end. The Slitheen, in a word, are a disaster. Poorly designed, poorly realised, and totally unconvincing, they rank alongside the likes of the Myrka and the Mestor. Their awkward, lurchy ambling is neither unsettling nor alien, and their big fake baby heads are laughable. Alien invasion episodes more or less live and die by how scary, cunning and powerful the aliens are. The Slitheen are giggling idiots whose faces look like babies. 'nuff said?

Finally, while I am glad that once again overt continuity was avoided, I did find it curious that the room of all the assembled alien experts didn't contain, say, Liz Shaw or Sarah Jane Smith. I wouldn't want to see a JN-T style story where the Doctor bumps into an old companion, and we're treated to a two minute clipfest for fans to mastubate to before the entire story descends into a batch of continuity references that go far and above the average viewer's head, but what would the harm of a brief, wordless cameo by Caroline John or Lis Sladen do? Obviously, they wouldn't recognize the Doctor due to his regeneration and the Doctor wouldn't recognize them because they've aged so much since he last saw them. It'd be a nice little bit of continuity, a nod to the fans, and wouldn't mean a thing to the general viewing audience (they'd just be one more face in the crowd). Ultimately, I suppose it wouldn't've meant anything, but I'd like to think in the Whoniverse of 2005 (or is that 2006?), Sarah Jane Smith and Liz Shaw would still be around and be considered two of the top authorities about aliens in the world.

While a second season has been confirmed, I still feel as if Doctor Who is at a critical stage, and needs to hold on to its thus far solid-to-spectacular ratings. If this were the third season of the new series and a fourth had been confirmed, I wouldn't be so worried about Aliens of London being a rather poor outing. But as the first traditional alien invasion storyline in the new series, it seems to have obliterated whatever goodwill and innovation the first three episodes built up in an effort to confirm old Doctor Who stereotypes to casual viewers (repetitive and silly storylines, cheap effects, etc.) While the Slitheen's horrifically awful realisation can't be fixed by this point, hopefully World War III will contain enough drama and innovation to restore some much-needed goodwill towards the series amongst the casual viewership. Any more episodes like this, and there might not be a TARDIS for David Tennent to step into.

Gee, and I thought last week's episode was about gaseous creatures from outer space.

It had me puzzling how such an episode, containing some of the most untraditional ideas ever seen in Dr Who, could actually feel so much like the old show. First up, we have the Doctor delivering Rose back to her home in an uninspiring London estate, asked by a policeman if their relationship is sexual and getting slapped by her mum. And then there are the flatulent frivolities of our erstwhile alien invaders, which even the writers of Red Dwarf might have deemed to base to include in their own little laid-back comedy space series, and which has spawned such a supercilious stream of negativity - on this website, at least - it would seem some of us have been forever disillusioned.

But the domestic scenes, whilst not as riveting as other elements of the show, still serve one or two important purposes. We are still viewing the Doctor and his travels through the eyes of his young companion - nothing wrong in that, especially at this relatively early stage. It adds depth to her character and let's us explore a little further this strange phenomenon in her life from the newcomer's perspective. This said, the relevance of such scenes will inevitably fade; I'd even say they're just about played out already, but I also think RTD is too experienced a writer to keep on penning redundant scenes - or at least I hope not, then it truly won't be anything more than Eastenders with a Dr Who credit sequence.

Now for the much-debated farting, and it's tempting to join the angry brigade here, as without doubt it is not what I would describe as a good idea. One can empathise with those screaming RTD, what are you doing to our show??? (for they do indeed think of it as theirs), and certainly there were a few rolled eyes exchanged about our house upon each boisterous release. But a few chuckles, too. We could have had a dry explaination for the aliens' compression technology, I suppose, necessarily bereft of wit or flair - but infinitely more tasteful! Shame, too, how so many fans have been alienated by it, as RTD should have known and considered. Still, it by no means ruined the episode, and there was plenty else to enjoy.

Of all the past eras, one is of course reminded most of Jon Pertwee's first couple of years. Nice to see the military given a modern spit and polish (no Action by HAVOC, thank the Maker), and to actually see a few UNIT personell; they haven't said a word yet and still look more promising than that sad bunch we came across in Batlefield. Nor could diehards miss that shot of the General and his aides striding down an Albion Hospital corridor, identical to the one of the Brigadier and UNIT officers in Spearhead from Space.

The spaceship's crash landing was very well done, and kudos to the idea of an augmented pig-in-spacesuit. I also had a satisfying chuckle when Jackie tripped the alert by mentioning Doctor, Blue Box and TARDIS over the alien hotline. Then we come to the Slitheen who, faulty compression technology aside, fit snugly into the Doctor Who canon (hey, our first bona-fide monsters!). And that cliff-hanger - what a cracker! If no one minds, I just have to talk about this sequence in detail (skip it if you aren't interested in a technical analysis), because to me this is what Dr Who's all about, and this one was textbook stuff, precision in compilation and editing. Starting off, we don't just see one Slitheen unmasking, but three, in different locations and each in front of one of our three main characters, whose predicaments appear equally perilous (allowing for great scene juxtapositioning): the Doctor ends up writhing from electrocution, Jackie's all alone in the house and Rose gets to see one of the guest characters tossed around like the proverbial rag doll. Lovely sound effects all the way through, from an unnerving electronic buzz as the Slitheen unmask to a couple of vicious, blood-curdling monster roars as the aliens emerge from their human skins and proceed to grow bigger...and bigger...and BIGGER. End with Jackie backed into a kitchen corner, one of the Slitheen towering over her, cue music sting and end credits, and phew! Want to watch it again!

As others have pointed out, some of the hard work put into this was then diminished by the immediate inclusion of next week's trailer. Now, the purpose of such a device is to generate anticipation, which works fine at the end of a story but is as detrimental as it is redundant when following a good cliff-hanger, and so easy to leave out.

Aliens of London was amusing and often exciting. Overall, the series lacks a little intensity for my taste; most of it isn't being treated seriously enough, an ever-present danger on a show such as this, but the death-knell if they ever give up and start playing it all tongue-in-cheek. This is why Billie Piper is the stand out actor so far; she plays it straight and convincingly. The Doctor, on the other hand, is a little too jokey, too frivilous much of the time. It's OK for him to have these moments and Chris Eccleston plays them fine, but I hope to see more serious stuff (he plays that even better).

Anyway, time to step off the soapbox, touch it up so it can take the strain again next week. Am enjoying the new series. The ratings prove that whatever RTD is doing works on the whole. There is cause for optimism.

I’ll be honest. I was affected by the fans’ reaction to Aliens Of London well before I’d seen it. Below par was the general consensus, it seemed – at best, amusing but pointless. Of course, there were only two reasons for this reaction – a pig in a spacesuit, and gratuitous flatulence. But rather than jumping straight into that, I’ll start from the beginning.

As we all now know, Rose is twelve months late for tea. This is dealt with beautifully, and even Jackie Tyler is easier to handle than she was a few weeks ago. Soon, an alien spaceship skims over their heads and crashes headlong into Big Ben, in a spectacular effects sequence, prompting a classic line from Rose. (Only works in context, sorry.) So far, so good. As the streets fill with military and onlookers, there is a sense of The Dying Days about this… but nobody seems, I don’t know, interested enough. There’s not much panic in these streets. At least, not any that’s being filmed. I realised a fundamental difference between this episode and the previous two – the style, the direction. Put simply, Keith Boak. The man behind Rose, my least-favourite among the first three episodes. Could Boak have pulled off a space-station whodunnit, or a Victorian ghost story? Somehow I doubt it. He’s good at certain aspects of this new Doctor Who, but to me he just doesn’t gel with the show as well as Euros Lyn. At the beginning of the episode, I was sure I’d be blaming Russell T. Davies, like everyone else… but it was clear from even this point in Aliens Of London that Davies still knew how to write for this show. It’s the direction, guys, the direction!

Anyway. Mickey’s turned up, and lo and behold, the guy’s got depth! Kudos to Noel Clarke for pulling his finger out and actually acting. Meanwhile, the Doctor’s inside Albion Hospital, while a defenceless scientist is attacked. He immediately gets the military onside… brilliant! Traditional Who again! And then a pig in a spacesuit turns up. I didn’t quite know what to make of this, until it got shot, and the Doctor reveals that it was just a poor, helpless little pig. For a moment, my heart ached, and I considered vegetarianism.

As for the scenes inside Number Ten, it’s like a casting-call for British actors. Thankfully, they’re all good, especially Navin Chowdhry and Penelope Wilton – their dialogue together is lovely. Then someone farts. The first time I watched this episode, I cringed, mainly because I’d seen it coming. But on my second viewing, I actually chuckled. I mean, look at the guy’s face! Granted, it wasn’t a huge guffaw, but I was duly tickled by it, just like the wheelie-bin in Rose.

The TARDIS reappears, and suddenly it’s a domestic. But oddly enough, the dynamic of the Doctor, Rose and Mickey works quite well. I got a nice warm feeling when the words “Doctor” and “TARDIS” triggered a red alert at Number Ten. Again, I felt like I was watching traditional Who. I also got a flashback to the TV movie (for some reason) when the Doctor and Rose are surrounded outside the TARDIS. But the Doctor knows better – this is UNIT. And they’re being escorted to Number Ten. I cheered at the mention of UNIT, and again when the Doctor takes over their emergency meeting with his own hypothesis, only to realise they’ve all been set up, and they’re now all trapped like mice. Yes, I actually cheered. Sad, I know. And we have a triple-pronged cliffhanger – has this ever happened before? The first time around, I was a little distracted, but when I watched it again, in the dark, a Slitheen turned to me – to me – and laughed. For a split second, I was terrified. That sting didn’t help either.

So, in conclusion, I still think this is the worst of the bunch. But that’s not to say I didn’t like it. It made for quite good entertainment. I’m actually looking forward to the second part. Doctor Who can be great TV at times – look at The Unquiet Dead for a recent example – but it can also, like Rose and this episode, be simple escapism. Which is good too.

I love the way Russell T Davies is structuring this season. Present, Future, Past – followed by a return to Present. It shows the massively flexible format of Doctor Who for new viewers, and gives variety for us old timers. It’s also lovely to break with the long held tradition of Doctor Who that companions can’t return home. But it does this with a fabulous twist.

My initial reaction after having watched Aliens of London was mostly positive, but with a few reservations. I had laughed a lot, yet been fascinated and enthralled too. The Doctor bringing Rose back a year late brought all kinds of emotion to the surface. The situation is potentially tragic, but Russell T derives some humour mixed with the trauma – there’s a realism absent from virtually all of previous DW. The touching base with Roses home is unique in the annals of Who – and I think Russell T has really brought something special to the show by doing this.

The homely feel continues as the Doctor and Rose watch the unfolding drama on TV – something that we all would do. I loved the chaos of the Tyler household, with the Doctor desperately trying to concentrate on the reports. This was the scene too where Christopher Ecclestons Doctor really seemed other-worldly, even though he really should fit right in dressed as he is. It’s his attitude to the whole adventure that isolates him.

The spaceship crashlanding into the Thames is magnificent, particularly the much-advertised-already destruction of Big Ben. It’s a real surprise for us that it’s a surprise for the Doctor (if you know what I mean!). After Jackies concerned phone call it’s also wonderful to see the Doctor get ushered in to help. Learning from the missed opportunity of the 1st episode (the Internet Doctor Who) it’s also nice to see references to the past - UNIT, even if this organization have clearly moved on in the army from the past.

There’s a tremendous amount of humour in this episode, some of which initially had me squirming, before I remembered the target audience, and the realization of why emerged. The celebrated bodily functions of the Cabinet, for example, which is explained away as the aliens getting the gases of Humans wrong – fair enough. Also my nieces and nephews (4-10 range) loved it, and thought it was the best thing about the episode! The pig pilot took me a while to get my head around too – but then the Doctors explanation of this frightened enhanced creature brought the whole escapade into tragedy. Amazing I could feel sorry for a pig dressed in a spacesuit!

It was lovely to see Jackie Tyler again, wonderfully played by Camille Coduri. She was one of the stand-outs of episode 1, and I’m glad she pops back throughout the series. Roses character is considerably stronger with these touchstones to home. Mickey was better in Aliens of London. Like many others I found him a bit wet in episode 1. There’s better material for the actor here – and it’s great to see the rivalry between him and the Doctor thrive.

Of special mention too is Penelope Wilton as MP Harriet Jones. I’m absolutely delighted this is a 2-parter simply because we get to spend more time with her. It’s a lovely part, and already rivalling Simon Callow for best Supporting Character of the series.

Then there’s the Slitheen. There’s a strong Monster presence in Doctor Who – many claiming Doctor Who wouldn’t be DW without the Monsters. They are big part of the whole mythos, and it’s good to see them in force in the new series. Episode 2 showed the monster makers were up to the challenge for this series, and the Slitheen further enhance that. I loved the fact too that they were made, complete with nodding dog heads, rather than totally SFX. They are a bit cheesy as a result – but let’s do the DW thing and suspend our disbelief. SFX enhances them, but they seem to definitely be a product of Creature Workshop, complete with men inside. I loved that emphasized blink they have, kind of like a camera. It will be interesting to see them more in the over dramatically titled next episode World War Three.

Nice to see a Cliffhanger too, even though the Whats On for Next Week pretty much destroyed the reason for it! Great to hear the DW screech again.

Episode 1 of this 2 parter left me wanting more of this story – exactly the idea surely. The light-heartedness was more centre stage for sure, but DW is very much part of the fun/entertainment industry after all. I really enjoyed it. 8/10

Well, after a week's break from the pen of Russell T Davies, the man himself has returned with a brand new script, this time dealing with the after effects of Rose's departure with the Doctor. Thanks to some fantastic acting and writing, the audience gets to experience a whole gamut of emotions, as we are taken back to England, where Rose is reunited with her family and friends...

Russell T Davies has often said that he can write sparkling dialogue without any effort whatsoever. 'Aliens of London' proves that he is certainly capable, but if he does it as easily as he says he does, then I am in awe. This script simply crackles with life and vitality, and I was in awe at the structure and balance. We move from domestic drama all the way to Earth-shattering revelations, so large is the scope of this tale.

The story arc doesn't seem to move any further forward, although an initial scene with a young boy spray-painting Bad Wolf made me sit up and take notice. That aside, Russell simply focuses on telling a gripping story, with revelation piled upon revelation. In my mind, he is quickly earning the title of the 21st Century version of Bob Holmes, in all honesty. I love this guy's writing, and this episode has everything I love in scripts.

Christopher Eccleston and Billie Piper turn in some charged performances, with Chris getting a chance to really show off his comic ability. Meanwhile, Billie gets to take the dramatic focus, with her really showing off her range as an actor in scenes with Camille Coduir and Noel Clarke. We've been very lucky, as an audience, to get such a fantastic pair of actors for our leads. Almost makes me sad we're losing Chris very soon.

The guest cast are generally rather good, although I must admit to being rather off-put by the cabinet officials who have been replaced by the Slitheen. Their constant giggling and grinning seemed a bit excessive, especially when you consider they were constantly farting (which ended up being better handled than I'd originally imagined). I must admit, however, that Naoko Mori gets my vote as the sexy female scientist!

The production values are generally very impressive, and the locations and sets used to realise this episode are all pretty much flawless. Not a wobble in sight. I was very impressed by the use the production team put the Cardiff Royal Infirmary to, as it looks damn nice on screen. As well as that, 10 Downing Street looks nice inside, even if it was a bit over-satured with red. Oh well - a minor flaw in a very impressive episode.

Obviously, in future years, when it comes to looking at the special effects, everyone is going to almost always talk about the space ship which crashes into Big Ben. It's a well realised scene, looking fantastic. The combination of CGI and model work looks great, with special thanks to Mike Tucker for his work. I do, however, have to admit that the Slitheen transmutation sequence was a bit ropey, as was that space pig costume.

Keith Boak generally does a pretty good job with the direction on this story, with his use of the camera giving the whole thing a rather important feel about it. One was never left in any doubt that the events we were witnessing were big. However, no overview of this epic quality would be complete with special mention of Murray Gold's incidental score, which is fantastic. He's been great on the series, and this episode is tops.

Overall, 'Aliens of London' is a great episode of Doctor Who. I doubt it will ever go down in the history books as a classic, but it's certainly a gripping piece of action-adventure, with some wonderful gags chucked in to keep everything in balance. Russell T Davies is quickly showing just how well he can handle the series, and with examples like this it's easy to see why. He can even write great cliffhangers!

Overall Score: 5 / 6 (Very Good)