Well, THAT was excellent.

The Slitheen aren't an alien species, but their last name. Their LAST NAME for cryin' out loud! That's awesome.

The Doctor sure knows a lot about 10 Downing Street.

Mickey hacking into UNIT's website. With the Doctor walking him through it. Ohhh that's just beautiful. Totally 2000s.

And, er, this Doctor likes to blow shit up, doesn't he?

And that last sequence, "I'll be back in 10 seconds"...that was about tear-jerking. You knew the TARDIS wasn't going to reappear right then, you just KNEW...but you still wanted it to. Mickey's reasoning for not coming along is some of the best I ever heard. And the Doctor reaffirms atheism for millions -- "You believe in something invisible, but it's right in front of you, 'Oh, no, can't see it!'" The Doctor is equally dark, goofy, manipulative, and deeply caring. "I could save the world but lose you." I don't think he's ever said anything of the sort to any other companion (on TV, anyway). Maybe that comes close, but even the McCoy era, with the focus on Ace in Season 26, never got that personal.

Absolutely lovely television.

Oh, and, er, have I mentioned I REALLY can't wait for next week's? DALEKS SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE

It’s reassuring to see how well the hide-and-seek element of DR. WHO has adapted to the 21st Century. In time-honoured tradition, Rose wasn’t the only one to hide behind the sofa. It was too much for my cousin’s son. Daddy had to switch it off, tape it and watch it later. However, Part 1 of this two-episode story had this 4-year-old excitedly explaining to his gran how the men in suits unzipped their foreheads “and then a monster popped out”.

The Slitheens’ hideous scheme to provoke war and reduce Earth to a spaceship-fuelling slagheap was as inventive as the Daleks’ machinations for Earth in 2164. It gladdened the heart to see The Doctor & Rose taking pot-shots at weapons of (mass) destruction and Blair. I’m sure Mickey fulfilled a dream of many in this country these last two years when he successfully blew Downing Street up with a missile.

Having said that, I’m not sure about another three-term female PM. I don’t think we’ve quite got over the last, although WHO got Thatcher (or Williams) in the top job four years before it happened, when The Brigadier addressed the PM as “Ma’am” over the phone. It looks as if The Doctor may have the ear of the future Prime Minister in stories to come, in a way Jack Bauer of the hit US thriller series had with President Palmer.

Since the BBC have gone to the trouble of issuing a U.N.I.T. website, which featured in the programme, I’m crossing my fingers for more of the United Nations Intelligence Taskforce as the new series progresses.

I was hoping Rose would stay a bit longer with Jackie & Mickey and curb The Doctor’s impatience to be off, but I guess that’s to come. I was also hoping the TARDIS would reappear ten seconds later, so Rose could tell her Mum she’d just been off on some crazy adventure, but you can never rely on the TARDIS’ navigation to that degree. It worked better as it played - because we all know what The Doctor & Rose are going to face next week....

A Catchphrase Ode to Slitheens that Explode

“Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!”
The Chuckle Bros may say
When confronted by Slitheen
Nasty, ’orrible and green.

“Nice to see you, nice,”
Would be Bruce’s remark
Echoing the Doctor’s toothy delight
When confronting aliens to fight.

“That’s the way to do it,”
Punch would proudly screech
As with a sledgehammer missile
He hit the Slitheen –oh where the Dr’s guile?

But “ come out wherever you are.”
Type phrases a Slitheen would not utter
As it seeks out Rose to kill.
Panto slapstick undermines the thrill.

“And now for something completely different,”
Should perhaps have been the title of No 5.
For jokes too often diminished tense scenes
Parody parading as the panto peacock preens.

“Will the real Slitheen please stand up”
Could be an effectual pun for obvious disparity
Between CGI quick monster movement
And rubber suited waddling ducks on the River Trent!

“Go on punk – make my day”
Is a nasty Doctor trait I’d rather do without.
His vicious mean berating of Rick or Mick
Was cold hearted, malevolent and sick!!

“Let’s start at the very beginning,”
Julie sang suggesting I was watching not 5, but 3.
This soap opera continued its prime reality brief
Give ‘em modern, social drama full of Eastender domestic grief.

“Thsufferin, Thuccotash” Sylvester uttered
In a frustrated sort of feline way.
Or is that the last TV Doctor turning in his dark matter
Thinking I had more witty gravitas than this Mad Hatter?

But I suppose these corny jokes and flatulence
Reached a young audience.
But writers – it’s not ‘Carry On Doctor with an MP’
Take your WHO seriously with wit, charm and moral gravity.

“That’s all Folks!!!!”

‘World War Three’ is a fascinating beast, really. It managed to succeed 45 minutes of fairly loathsome drivel with a pretty good ending to the story, that, for the first time this series, really felt like Doctor Who again. It had nice emotional moments with Jackie and Mickey (characters who have improved noticeably) and some rather good action, building to a truly epic ending as a Royal Navy missile hurtled towards Downing Street and the alien Slitheen came within touching distance of controlling Britain’s nuclear arms. And, unbelievably, the music, which throughout the series has been God-awful, really helped! To be honest, I liked ‘World War Three’.

Now, if anybody reading this happened to read my previous review, you may be surprised at how I have changed my tune, but I will assume that you haven’t. Suffice to say that I concluded it by saying “RTD must go now!” Well, I absolutely refuse to take back any of what I said last week (except the bit about WW3 being no better than ‘Aliens of London’), because ‘Aliens of London’ was truly diabolical, a view which I think stands up even in light of ‘World War Three’. Nevertheless, I do think that ‘World War Three’ marks a huge improvement over it’s predecessor, and may even signal the moment when this ‘New Who’ grew up, and began to approach the quality of the old series.

Perhaps the biggest improvement is in Christopher Eccleston. Despite a dreadful moment when escaping from a gang of armed policemen by talking to them at length, then stepping backwards into a lift and waiting for the doors to close, he really seemed to have grown up as well. I think this is down to the ‘heavier’ material he was given, for example when speaking to Jackie from the Cabinet room, and to the ending. Gone are the childish taunts of last week – this time, during the Doctor’s final scene with Mickey, I felt like cheering! This man, forgiving, generous and compassionate, was at last the Time Lord I idolise. That conversation more than made up for the uncomfortable scene in which the Doctor stole Rose from under Jackie’s nose, again, despite her heart-felt pleas to her daughter not to go, at which point I began to slightly resent him again.

And it has to be said, the Doctor’s solution to the problem of the Slitheen – who, by the way, are a nice example of the theme running through the season that evil deeds are quite often committed for money – was gloriously orthodox! Blowing up the monsters with a ruddy huge weapon is such a staple of the Doctor’s attitude to life that I was childishly gleeful when he did it! The inclusion of UNIT as a vital plot mechanism was also a very touching favour to the fans of the old series by RTD, one that made me feel even happier. To add the icing to the cake, ‘World War Three’ managed to press all these buttons whilst simultaneously delivering some quite daring (and rather obvious) satire of that egomaniac warmonger Blair and the lies he told over the invasion of Iraq. Great!

I still don’t like the way the series looks, but I am more than willing to stick with the domestic scenes that Russell T Davis has levered into the more traditional Doctor Who-type plots, and I feel I can excuse the rather odd plot holes that he puts in his scripts, mostly because I am afraid I might be missing something. Is there a reason why all the Slitheen were affected by the ID-card’s electric charge, not just the one that the Doctor put it on? And how come the Slitheen are not nuclear capable anyway? Why on earth does vinegar actually make them explode? There could be answers, but it doesn’t matter very much.

Despite all these improvements over last week’s debacle, the best bit in this week’s episode still happened to be the trailer for ‘Dalek’, for which I can’t wait. That Dalek sure looks like one mean mother – the Doctor’s tortured shout of “Why can’t you just DIE?!?” made me chuckle with joy, as did his somewhat chilling “Population [of Salt Lake City]? … All dead”. This might finally be the TV story which treats the Daleks properly and gives them the power and terror that we audio and comic fans know they have. I am looking forward to this one!

World War III was an exciting conclusion to an almost old-fashioned monster yarn begun in last week's Aliens of London, replete with frantic hide-and-seek chases and impressive explosions. The Doctor also had his thinking powers put a little more to the test as, with a little help from Harriet Jones (MP Flydale North) he cleverly deduced the aliens' planet of origin and hence their biological weakness. That said eight-foot tall alien could explode upon contact with a jar of pickled condiments is verging on the far-fetched, sure, as is the Doctor's and Mickey's rather simple hack into the UK's missile defense system, but actually I didn't have much of a problem with either idea, as their underlying principles remain valid enough (not that more realism wouldn't have been nice).

Unfortunately, though, this was the episode where some other worrying trends of the show came to the fore, and the first time I truly questioned Russell T Davies' suitability as writer/executive producer. In past reviews I've given him credit for some great writing and imaginative ideas. His writing skill is still not in question. But he's trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.

Of most concern is his blueprint for the new Doctor. With an actor of Chris Eccleston's calibre in the titular role there are, I'm afraid, no excuses. Let's put it this way: the Doctor is NOT a character from a TV soap! He doesn't argue with his companion's mother and he doesn't make cow-eyes at nineteen year-old girls, or is given to mushy, quasi-romantic sentiments ("I could save the world but lose you" and "I'm so glad I met you" being prime offenders). I think RTD is trying to convey a certain (mostly platonic? Oh, I hope so) affection for his young companion but it's all about as subtle as a Slitheen fart. Nor can I recall the Doctor, Hartnell included, being this consistently and irritatingly rude. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder from the Time War? If that's going to be an ongoing theme this year then I'm looking forward to his next regeneration. You could make the Doctor an emotionally overloaded wreck in need of counselling but I think I'd rather watch Timelash. Finally, as I alluded to last week, he's grinning far too much of the time. Here in Australia the dreaded Season Seventeen is playing weeknights, yet with some surprise I've noticed how much more serious Tom Baker is playing it in comparison, even at that dubious stage stage in his tenure.

Almost as annoying is having to watch your favourite program (ostensibly a family show, I might add), serving as forum for its new writer's socio-political agenda. Some fans seem rapt by it. I don't disagree with every sentiment, either, but would much rather RTD left most of it out. He's touching on complex, let alone divisive, issues (oops, there goes the American franchise!) and oversimplifying them, in this case with one of the Seven Deadly Writers' Sins: the use of a non-applicable - and inappropriate - allegory. I have no problem with a family show stimulating the younger generation in how to think (as in The Unquiet Dead, for example) - but not what to think; there's a difference. This episode was practicaly telling us how to vote!

On the plot front, I would like to know why all the Slitheen were electrocuted when the Doctor slapped just one with his ID badge - the current was transmitted, presumably, via their collars, though this wasn't explained and doesn't make a whole lot of sense; one of them better not touch a dodgy toaster! The Slitheen's underlying plan was equally difficult to decipher. I guess that, as a family business (nasty, nasty capitalists - like Cassandra, whaddayaknow) rather than as an entire race of creatures, they had no access to military equipment with which to nuke a planet from orbit, despite numerous other examples of their advanced technology. I hope I'm right in this analysis as it was not made very clear in the script.

As far as the general tone of the series goes, we've had one serious episode (written by someone else) in five - in other words, the balance is off. Dr Who is a sci-fi show which can accomodate comedy elements, not the other way around and having giggling, farting aliens seems to mock what the series is really about. When it is serious, half the time it's a D&M between Rose and her mum or Rose and Mickey. Perhaps this is why, in an effort to offset such maudlin drivel, we've seen the Doctor more insulting and off-hand than usual, when he's not all lovey-dovey. He seems to dislke the domestic intrusions and by now so do I. A little here and there could be justified - even in this episode I enjoyed the scene right at the end with Mickey (the way the Doctor invited him into the TARDIS then helped him save face was nicely handled and a good character moment, managing to convey the Doctor's genuine level of caring without resorting to sentimental dialogue), but most of it is being overplayed. Likewise, the sexual innuendo is coming thick and fast. This time we had references to adultery and bisexuality, last week paedophilia ("Did you find her on the internet?") and before that trans-sexuality. They are amusing lines and I'm definitely no Mary Whitehouse, but I'm glad I don't have a six year-old asking me for explanations.

My optimism from last week is being severely tested; right now I'm of the opinion that RTD is pushing the show in wrong directions. Hope I'm not reading too much into one story.

I think my soapbox just broke.

Here’s what I was going to do. I was going to write a separate review of this episode, and then a full review of the Aliens Of London two-parter. And now, I find myself unable to do that. Why? Because the two episodes are so different from each other. So, so different. I shall explain…

We open with our cliffhanger, and the Doctor very quickly gets himself out of it. But remember, this was a three-tier cliffhanger! No matter. In one swift move, the Doctor solves every problem. For now. Cue titles. I gave a cheer. This set the standard for the rest of the episode. I cheered a lot. And laughed a lot.

Seriously, this was a hilarious episode. Right from the very beginning, with the Doctor’s pathetic-sounding explanation to the military about the alien cover-up, I was laughing every few seconds. We have a lot of chasing through corridors this time around, with another cheer from me. I’ve warmed to the Slitheen, too, partly due to the way blink, partly to the way they move. Velociraptors, anyone? A few belly-laughs later, the Doctor, Rose and Harriet (great character!) have locked themselves in the Cabinet room. And spend the remainder of the episode there.

This was a great move on the part of RTD, who’s delivered a script here that’s about as good as The End of the World. The Slitheen’s plan, with its subtleties and intricacies, is pure genius. Keith Boak has done a better job here too, and manages to keep the action going even while our main characters are stuck in a room for half an hour.

Oh! The dialogue! This is cracking stuff… the best RTD dialogue so far, and acted beautifully. Meanwhile, Mickey and Jackie are fighting off their own monster, and we’re treated to our first “gross monster explosion” of the season. Vinegar, Hannibal, “You kiss this man?”… gorgeous stuff. The Doctor and Mickey are again displaying a wonderful chemistry together, even when just talking on the phone.

David Verrey, by the way, delivers an excellent performance here as Joseph Green, the acting PM (although we all know what he really is). The direction and the music add to the atmosphere the moment he announces to the world that they are at war. At this point, I realised I was no longer laughing – I was too riveted by the drama. I’d always thought Joss Whedon had created an amazing thing with Buffy, a perfect fusion of comedy and drama. We all know RTD is an immense Buffy fan, and if you look at Queer As Folk, it’s obvious he knows how to pull off exactly the same fusion. Never has this been clearer than in World War Three. Did I say this was cracking stuff? Well… er, it is.

The effects, too, are gorgeous. That missile heading across England’s south-east had me completely convinced. The resolution of the story is perfect, and we all know Harriet Jones will make a wonderful PM.

But back to Rose’s domestic life. Camille Coduri as Jackie deserves a mention here for adding a bit more substance to her character, just as Noel Clarke did with his character of Mickey in the previous episode. I was really touched by the way she handled Rose’s decision to join the Doctor permanently on his travels. When I heard the closing sting, I sat back with a satisfied grin.

As a whole, I don’t think I could ever watch Aliens Of London followed by World War Three. Oddly enough, in the event of a huge new series marathon, I might even skip the former and move straight onto the latter. Like I said before, the two episodes are just so different! The acting, the script, the music, the direction, the effects, the pacing, the humour, the fear factor, the drama… with Aliens Of London, I really thought this series was about to go downhill, at least for a little while. Mercifully, World War Three proved me wrong. It only dipped for one week, then shot straight back up. My confidence in this series has been reassured. Bring on the Dalek!!!