I wasn’t looking forward to these episodes for many reasons; one it would mean the end of the series, once again Saturday TV would return to celebrity wallpapering or Test the nation hamster edition or such like. Secondly it would be the end of Doctor #8 the ever gurning Christopher Eccleston whose rapidly grown on me like head lice on a schoolchild. And three a guest list that sounded just as ghastly as Ken Dodd and the annoying little welsh bloke from please sir in Delta and the Bannermen. .I mean Anne Robinson as a killer robot? The Doctor landing in big brother? Trinny and Susannah doing anything, none of these things should work this should sink the Doctor back into the dark days of the mid 80’s but some it did work ,some how it was funny, somehow you cared and by the end of episode 12 you were on the edge of your seat

The timing of this cleaver witty script was inspired airing two weeks into big brother six’s run it had the Doctor materialising in the bb house where its inhabitants were a bolshy black girl a cute self obsessed wannabe and a camp over the top man who was obsessed with winning it was like id switched to channel four by mistake, Rose had landed on the weakest link with the bloke from hustle and Jack was treading the fine line from being as annoying as Melanie Bush. Talking of which I cant work out if I like Captain Jack or not, true he adds a lot of fun to the show but for me he just brings back nightmares of Edd the duck and Andy peters, could they have managed to leave him dead at the end of episode 13. Ala Adric? Of course it turns out that they are all back on the game station (not the videogame store full of spotty youths sneering as I enquire if they still sell mega drive games but the space station from the long game ep. 7) and the Doctor gets to be heroic trying to save rose from the clutches of the evil Anne Robinson Rose is apparently killed and if it hadn’t been leaked to the press you would be shocked that she had in fact been sent to a space ship full of Daleks. As The end of this episode approaches you would be mistaken for thinking that the Doctor has lost everything the advancing Dalek empire was surly going to exterminate everything in its path they’d got rose and he was stuck with annoying Jack surly he must give up? Of course this being Doctor who he didn’t in stead he acted his socks of and gave a speech worthy of Hartnell he threatened the might of the Dalek empire with a line stolen from Davinadroid by the time he said rose im coming to get you, suddenly you were nine years old again suddenly you were on the edge of the seat this what this series was missing a bloody good cliff-hanger! The trouble with this and the following episode was basically the same problem that Eastenders and many of the soaps have, the press has printed just about every shock and twist the episode had to offer and whilst it was by no means predictable you just knew everything that was going to happen, imagine if they’d promoted the sixth sense with it’s the one with the bloke from moonlighting plays the dead bloke or the crying game as find out why that birds got an Adams apple and there would be uproar Doctor who should be the same. I understand that yes knowing the Daleks were going to be in it was a draw and yes it did wonders for the ratings but imagine the shock if you didn’t know? Al ready it’s been announced that the cybermen are to appear in series two lets hope that it wasn’t a twist to the story!

The second part of the story episode 13 the parting of the waves was a rollercoaster ride it began with the best rescue ever and also conveniently forgot about the not being able to fire guns in the TARDIS rule but we’ll forgive them that for now. The Doctor and co then go back to the gamestaion to prepare the people of earth for war. It is then that Rose meats Linda, the Drs Fellow Big brother contestant. Billie piper steels the show again with a wonderful bitchy glance.

The tone of this episode is a lot darker than the other and this is a very welcome Change. The whole episode has an air of mystery. I mean you know the Doctor can succeed you know the Daleks are going to be destroyed and if the surprise hadn’t been spoiled you know that the Doctor will live to fight another day but how will he achieve the impossible.

The parting of the ways evoked memories of caves of androzoni, you knew that Eccleston would become Tenant but how would he be killed? Would he be exterminated would he sacrifice his life for others? Sacrifice was the theme of the show Jack going to his doom to ward the Daleks off, Linda valiantly getting killed in the best extermination of the show, rose becoming bad wolf and the Doctor sacrificing himself saving her. Sure the Doctor was a hero but what the show was trying to tell us was that we have it in our selves to achieve an equal greatness. It was with this message that parallels with his previous series the second coming began yes we can have a superhero/deity /adventurer alien save the would but we have it in us to do it by our selves, utter tosh but he’s heart is in the right place. There was obviously a lot of money spent on the episode and it showed. The emperor Dalek was great although it would have been nice to see Davros again. The whole religious subtext was good and gave the Daleks a much needed depth .

Rose is tricked by the Doctor into going back home where we saw the welcome return of Jackie and Mickey. It was here that the story was at its most dramatic. Rose realised that she couldn’t go back to normality and helped draw a close to he life on earth. Billie gave a sterling performance here and she is doing a wonderful job but have you noticed what a weird mouth she has she has too many teeth I’m sorry I digress. Seeing bad wolf scrawled everywhere around her she finally solves the puzzle that has had haunted her since she entered the TARDIS. With the help of Mickey who yet again realises that she will never be with him again (just how many times is he going to realise this! Just go and get another girlfriend one without a time travelling boyfriend) Rose becomes bad wolf (my bet was on the time lords it’s a good job I never put money on it!)And single handily destroys the Daleks making sure that they never return again, or till the ratings start to flag. As a mater of interest The Anne Robinson droid shot four Daleks but in the previous episode her laser been was found to be a transporter beam so where did they go? Sadly rose/bad wolf bought the annoying jack back to life before getting all the life sucked out of her (a bit like being married to Chris evens I suppose.)By the Doctor before taking her unconscious like Davidson did with with peri and she woke up to see the Doctor become Casanova. It was these final scenes that spoilt the show really, I mean regeneration is big thing in any time lord’s life and you don’t want it rushed at breakneck pass. The whole regeneration thing was just so rushed and handled in a blasé matter of fact way. Oh by the way I’m becoming another actor full stop .Did Eccleston decide he wanted to leave at the last minute so they just grafted regeneration as an afterthought? David Tenant was only on the screen for a second but exhumed a charisma to match Eccleston the Tardis keys are in safe hands. All in all a couple of classy episodes. Roll on Christmas.

Can somebody please tell me why the hell it is that so-called professional scriptwriters seem physically incapable of writing coherent scripts? There are many things that can make a script good В– pacing, action, insightful or entertaining dialogue, deeper questions and thoughts, originality, surprises В– and many things that can make it bad В– viz all the opposites of these things. But beyond all of this, there are a few things that a script must have in order to be called a finished script at all. It must, for example, be 45 minutes long in the case of Dr. Who. It must be technically realizeable given its budget. And it must be logically coherent. You can pen the most brilliantly entertaining story in the world, but if it doesnВ’t make sense, itВ’s not done.

Now Doctor Who is science fantasy, not science fiction, so thereВ’s a lot of headroom in this regard. But even so, there still exists a standard. After running a whole season that mostly made sense В– a first for Dr. Who - I was beginning to think that holes were a thing of the past, that somehow our new generation of writers had learned from the errors of the old, that theyВ’d learned how to write. There was the baffling fact that the car somehow knew that it had to circle the church in FatherВ’s Day В– and yup, that sure ruined that episode in short order В– but aside from that we were doing fairly well.

Then comes the season finale, and while it still managed to be one of the most fun of the twelve storiesВ… Just to list a few brief examples to serve as food for my point here: How can the Daleks break into the TARDIS, no matter where it is? Why would they transmat the Doctor into reality TV (as opposed to, as Davies himself writes, a volcano)? Why, given the chance to disintegrate the Doctor rather than beam him aboard their vessel, do they let him run free, even going so far as to instruct blue chicky with wires in her to let him move unimpeded? And why do they then spend the rest of the story trying desperately to kill him? In fact, given that theyВ’re terrified of him being the one factor in the Universe that could bring about their end, why would they go out of their way to bring him into the picture in the first place?

This isnВ’t nit-picking, nor the stomping ground of Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons. This is basic scriptwriting 101.

Now this being time travel, and in particular being a story that ends with a God-like figure manipulating the whole timeline with omnipotent power, you could probably come up with any sort of half-baked explanation you like. That doesnВ’t excuse the fact that Davies simply didnВ’t bother to try.

People complain about deus ex machina (or should that be dei in the plural?), but at least a script with a deus ex machina is a finished script. It may be lazy and unfulfilling, but itВ’s done. A script that doesnВ’t make sense is not only lazy; itВ’s incompetent. It should still be on the writerВ’s office floor. If anyone is free to throw away the constraints of causality just to make a distracting hour of TV, then whatВ’s the point in putting any effort in whatsoever? Why are we paying pro writers big bucks to not-do their job? Why not just get a drunk from the nearest pub to come up with something creative for a couple more pints?

Maybe Davies believes that a coherent plot is worth the price to pay for a slightly more interesting one. But doesnВ’t that sound like the plenary definition of a cheap thrill? Or maybe he thinks that because a large portion of his audience consists of children, heВ’s justified in ignoring plot logic, since they probably wonВ’t notice anyway.

But hereВ’s a lesson he seems to need: a large portion may be children, but the majority are still adults. And seeing as many of those adults are people who were children when the original series was being broadcast, and seeing as they are the very reason that the series is back in the first place, they deserve his attention. Besides, donВ’t we all want childrenВ’s shows that captivate us when weВ’re young but that we can look back on when weВ’re older like a favourite stuffed animal and say, В‘Yeah, that really was good.В’ В…as opposed to just shaking our heads and wondering how we were ever sucked in?

Hell, I think a story where thereВ’s somebody hiding in the TARDIS so the Doctor materializes it underwater and opens the door sounds pretty exciting. Or how about one where giant ants come out of my butt and make me feed them sugar cubes? At least IВ’m being satirical, and so I suspect was Christopher Bidmead in 1980. But Davies is not. Get your $&^! together, and if you canВ’t take this seriously, move over for someone who can.

It seems like a screechingly bad idea В– Earth, hundreds of thousands of years in the future, dominated by . . . turn of the 21st Century reality-TV shows? OK, so maybe it doesnВ’t just *seem* like a bad idea. On paper, this story really couldnВ’t be more ludicrous, and from hearing about it beforehand I was frankly dreading it. And while I wouldnВ’t call this two-parter a classic story, or even a great one, ultimately it is a surprisingly watchable one, and considering the mess of a plot weВ’re asked to swallow, that is accomplishment enough in itself. The key to the success of this story, apart from the obvious crowd-pleasing plot points, might be Joe AhearneВ’s straight-faced approach to the material В– when the Anne Droid is brought out, it isnВ’t presented as a joke (even though the script works hard to make it one), and AhearneВ’s unwillingness to wink at the audience helps us to believe it (or to try to, anyway, which is always enough in В‘Doctor WhoВ’).

The idea of TV shows being tied in to a hideous conspiracy is hardly the freshest at this point В– in fact, even in the context of this new series, the enslaved-by-television-fads concept is basically a reworking of ideas from this storyВ’s prequel, В‘The Long Game.В’ Russell T. Davies really doesnВ’t take his satire anywhere new here В– but still, his point is certainly more relevant than ever. Perhaps the most disappointing thing about it is that he chose to use *real* TV shows as the butt of his jokes instead of inventing his own В– not only would this have allowed him to satirize a little more freely, it also would have diminished the storyВ’s high gimme-a-break factor. But he made the choice that he did, and for the most part itВ’s not too irritating. The В‘What Not to WearВ’ segments are perhaps overly broad, but John Barrowman plays them so lightly that it seems at worst a silly distraction. And perhaps the most successful element of this story is the Controller, who works as a sad and terrifying symbol for the modern television viewer: literally tuned in to hundreds of channels, ostensibly controlling which ones get accessed, but imprisoned and blinded by her viewing habits at the same time. A smart, very scary idea.

This story abruptly drops the satire to bring back the Daleks, of course, and they look great in their new gold livery. Personally, I was relieved that the rumored В‘spider DaleksВ’ never actually surfaced В– as someone mentioned, the Daleks are actually the most genuinely futuristic-looking of the new seriesВ’ monsters, and despite decades of pepperpot jokes, this is a real testament to the genius of Ray CusickВ’s design. But the Daleks themselves arenВ’t used too well by the script В– theyВ’re presented as traditional В‘RemembranceВ’-style Daleks: i.e., mindless tanks with annoying voices. There was all sorts of speculation about whether Davros would or would not appear in this story; we got the Emperor Dalek instead, but it might as well have been Davros, and the seriesВ’ continuing concept of the Daleks as dependent on these В‘Super-DaleksВ’ for orders just doesnВ’t show them at their best, in my view. Still, the script makes them imposing enough В– only one gets blown up, and when the Daleks appear at the space station window to kill Lynda (whilst flashing a four-syllable word, a lovely touch), itВ’s a great moment. And of course there are the requisite (and fun) nods to the past (В“MY VISION IS IMPAIRED! I CANNOT SEE!В”). But, again, Nicholas BriggsВ’s voices are a touch self-conscious, and the Daleks are so bloody *slow*! Honestly, I think my vacuum cleaner could outrun all half a million of them and not break a sweat.

As for the Doctor, some have convincingly argued that the character wouldnВ’t hesitate to wipe out life on Earth by using the Delta Wave against the Daleks, especially since he didnВ’t shrink from destroying Skaro in В‘Remembrance of the DaleksВ’ and, it may be inferred, from doing the same to Gallifrey itself during the Time War. But to me it actually seems quite consistent with the DoctorВ’s character В– not only has he often shown himself unable to single-handedly take life to achieve his aims (he most often prefers to let others do it for him, as Blon Slitheen rightly points out in В‘Boom Town!В’), it can also be argued that by this point the Earth is more his real home than Gallifrey anyway, and is therefore the *only* thing that could stand in his way of destroying an enemy forever В– even the Daleks. I think it works perfectly, in fact.

As for the explanation of the В‘Bad WolfВ’ mystery, and the deus ex machina of RoseВ’s final solution of the Dalek problem, they have been much reviled by some fans, and, indeed, they are kind of crazy. The use of the TARDIS as a talisman to magically save the day at the eleventh hour is always somewhat unfair; it doesnВ’t help that Davies already did the same thing in the previous story, В‘Boom Town!В’ But itВ’s obvious that Davies wanted this first series of the restored В‘Doctor WhoВ’ to go out with a big bang, and these two story elements certainly provide that, even if they donВ’t work as nicely as some fans would hope. The story also achieves a sort of large scale in that it sees the shocking (if ultimately unreal) deaths of two companions, as well as the (real) one of the likeable semi-assistant Lynda. The floodlit finale is slightly melodramatic, but it works, allowing Rose to sacrifice herself to save the Doctor, and then allowing him to do the same thing for her В– which is nice. And the regeneration scene itself is just lovely В– for all his bluffed arrogance throughout the season, this Doctor is particularly aware of his own faults, and his self-deprecating jokes as he changes (В“Can you imagine that, me with no head? DonВ’t say itВ’d be an improvement.В”), make this perhaps most fallible and sad of all the DoctorВ’s incarnations seem terribly human for a moment. And then, the sudden change В– for a moment the series really *is* brand-new again, and even those of us who have seen many regenerations past experience the shock of it as if for the first time.

In the end, this may not be the smartest В‘Doctor WhoВ’ story ever, but itВ’s tasteful enough, and magical at the end В– a fitting finale to a new age.

Come In, Number Nine, Your Time Is Up…

There’s so much to talk about with these two episodes that I barely know where to begin, so let’s start at the very beginning. After a short recap, it suddenly appears that I’ve sat on the remote and switched to Channel Four. Of course, I’ve done no such thing. Having destroyed one reality TV Show in the ratings, Doctor Who now proceeds to send up the daddy of them all for an encore. It may be somewhat implausible for Big Brother to still be on air in 200100 AD, but frankly, that’s besides the point. The scenes of The Doctor in the Big Brother house are cheeky, very iconic, and superbly written and played by all. In the meantime, Rose’s Weakest Link segment provides some real danger, and Captain Jack is an absolute scream in What Not To Wear.

And to think when Russell first mentioned copyright issues with this episode way back in his first DWM column, I was convinced he was talking about using the daleks. Speaking of which…

They’re back. Sadly, it’s impossible to keep these things secret anymore – the age of Earthshock has long since passed – but for the BBC themselves to spoil the revelation of the daleks by including them in the Boom Town trailer just smacked of desperate ratings-grabbing. But never mind that – what are they actually like?

Thankfully, they’re superficially the same daleks we know and fear from Episode Six, and all the talk of redesigns that filled me with such dread has proved to be unfounded. There are literally hundreds of them onscreen, and they’re unstoppable (indeed, I counted only four dalek casualties before the final showdown). Their new-found religion/madness is intended to give them new depth, but it is really only through the Emperor’s dialogue that it is explored – otherwise the daleks act exactly as daleks should, exterminating everything and everyone in sight (and for my money, it is Lynda-with-a-y who gets the most spectacular exit). Even the TARDIS crew are not exempt from this fate, and after a touching goodbye to The Doctor and Rose, Captain Jack dies with honour, dignity, and most of all, style.

The daleks’ master plan, though, is somewhat flawed. Given that their species is weapons capable of cracking open an entire planet, why don’t they destroy the satellite once The Doctor has shown up? (And whilst I’m nit-picking, how exactly did the Controller acquire a transmat capable of breaching the defences of the TARDIS in flight?)

Nevertheless, the invasion of the satellite gives The Doctor a superb moral dilemma to grapple with at the series’ climax. He’s already hurting having wiped out the Time Lords in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to destroy the daleks – of course he’s not going to do it again. This whole episode is built upon past stories in which The Doctor’s actions have not turned out for the best, so this time he picks the supposedly “cowardly” option instead.

Fortunately for him, Rose’s more simplistic outlook means she is far more willing to commit genocide than The Doctor is. Given slightly-explained new powers from the TARDIS she is able to destroy all the daleks, bring Jack (but no-one else?) back to life, initiate the whole Bad Wolf thing, and get a snog out of The Doctor to boot. However overblown and poorly-explained this sequence may be, there’s no denying that her performance is incredible, with Cate-Blanchett-in-Lord-Of-The-Rings effects to match.

In summary, the whole show is well-structured, well-acted (even by Mickey and Jackie) and beautifully directed, with some superb dialogue. My one complaint with the realisation of this story is the amount of glare applied to the picture – especially when the daleks’ head-bulbs light up. It’s been a minor irritation all series, but it’s really noticeable here. However, such quibbles are unimportant. We’ve been given the flashiest finale to date in a gloriously wild and unpredictable season, in which Chris Eccleston has cemented a truly wonderful portrayal of the Doctor. He will be sorely missed by many.

9/10.

But wait! I can’t finish without adding my two cents about the final scene. Chris’s final words are beautifully written and delivered, and his regeneration is originally executed and very moving. Unfortunately, he appears to have turned into that Casanova chappie, who may have a lot more of The Doctor’s quirkiness than Chris did, but appears at first glance to be too young, comical and generally unimpressive to play the part with the necessary weight and conviction. I predict many comparisons to Sylvester McCoy in the episodes to come. “Time will tell. It usually does.”

My problem with Russell T. Davies’ writing isn’t that he goes too far with sex, satire, and humor – it’s that he doesn’t go far enough. “Bad Wolf / Parting of the Ways” is a good case in point. When I first heard about these episodes, I anticipated that Davies would use Doctor Who as a forum for wry commentary on the reality TV phenomenon. But there is no commentary here; there’s just the skin of a good idea, wasted. The Doctor goes on “Big Brother” … only to break a camera and leave. Captain Jack gets a makeover, Rose plays “The Weakest Link” (surely it would’ve been more exciting if she had to play against the Doctor?), and ultimately it amounts to nothing. It’s not a satire because it’s not reflective in any way; it merely presents these TV programs as they actually are, only with robots. I expected more.

The Daleks, too, are a wasted opportunity. The lone creature in “Dalek” was a truly formidable villain, but here the half-million-strong Dalek army is firmly back in camp mode. I can hardly believe the same Joe Ahearne directed these episodes; the Daleks look so unimpressive here, congregating in their lousy spaceship set and screaming their little heads off. One of them even has dome lights that feebly sputter out-of-tune with its dialogue – it’s amateur hour, just like old times! When the Doctor defies them with his “power” speech about rescuing Rose, he sounds less like a mighty hero, and more like the narrator of next week’s coming attraction.

The excitement picks up in the second part, but only a little. The Doctor’s rescue of Rose is too quick and too convenient, and he embarrasses the Daleks first by blunting their rays with a force field, then by intimidating them with one of his obnoxious new catchphrases, “shut it!” Good grief, the Daleks look wimpy here. The wrinkle that they are religious comes from nowhere and goes nowhere, much like the reality TV concept. I think Davies wanted to take a shot at Bush (the religious “Emperor” of America), but, as with the Slitheen two-parter, he failed to channel his political anger into an interesting story. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter if the Daleks are religious or not, since all they do is shout their old clichйs and exterminate extras.

Speaking of exterminations, the battle scenes in “Parting of the Ways” fall extremely flat coming after “Dalek.” We’ve seen all the new Dalek tricks before; in fact, the shots of them dissolving bullets look so familiar, they might as well have used stock footage. Once again we get extras blazing away uselessly with machine guns and refusing to retreat, like any sensible person would do. And, once again, the Daleks are incredibly slow - it’s hard to be scared of something that moves at one-eighth of a mile per hour.

The scenes of Rose with Jackie and Mickey feel like retreads as well. How many times must Jackie shrilly condemn the Doctor? How many times must Rose tell Mickey that her life in the TARDIS is better than anything he could offer her? It’s not great characterization because it never evolves; the same debates are rehashed endlessly. Davies again wastes a potentially good idea. I might care about Rose’s home life, if Jackie and Mickey were depicted as anything but wafer-thin and semi-ludicrous characters without a brain cell to share between them.

I haven’t even touched on the worst aspect of this two-parter – the climax. The Bad Wolf mystery is resolved in an amazingly unsatisfying fashion. In the end, the phrase “Bad Wolf” is meaningless; it’s not a proper clue, since it has no actual connection to Rose, the TARDIS, the Daleks, or Rose’s plan to rescue the Doctor. So, then, it was never a proper mystery. It was just a weak linking device for the season, designed to generate some artificial suspense. The payoff is so feeble that it wasn’t worth it.

Equally unsatisfying is Rose’s sudden elevation to godhood. Faced with a huge dilemma – how can the Doctor beat half a million Daleks? – Davies cops out and simply grants the companion limitless energy from the time vortex. I find it weird and frustrating that the same fans who hate the miracle resolution of the TV Movie, when fairy dust resurrects Chang Lee and Grace, seem perfectly willing to accept Rose as a God From the Machine (literally!) who miraculously saves the day with the aid of shiny special effects.

Then there’s Eccleston. He’s not very good in these episodes. I hate his performance when he’s torn about activating the Delta wave; he overplays the moment horribly and pulls some truly ridiculous “tense” faces. His death scene is not particularly affecting, as Davies just serves up the silly “fantastic” catchphrase instead of writing proper, thoughtful dialogue. It’s a bad end for a bad Doctor.

I'm sorry to say that the new Doctor Who, the new Daleks, and the show’s new writers seem to have used up their bag of tricks already. There’s an overly familiar feel to this finale, like it’s been hastily cobbled together from the rest of the season without proper thought or care (for example – why doesn’t Rose make any reference to the Dalek she befriended earlier?). I truly am disappointed; this is some of the very worst science fiction that I’ve ever seen, really sloppy and cheap and not at all imaginative.

Perhaps I’m just finally tired of Doctor Who. It doesn’t seem to have evolved much, or at least it hasn’t evolved in the right ways, and as I watched this season I kept wondering why I wasn’t tackling some meaty, intellectual Criterion DVDs instead. The new series may be entertaining, and it may be reasonably popular, but it’s not actually good or particularly smart. If you’ll forgive a horrid pun, I think the bloom is already off the Rose.

Now this is more like it.

If you’ve already read my review of the previous episode, Bad Wolf, you’ll know it disappointed me a great deal, after so much hype. It could’ve been so much more, et cetera. So I guess I was dreading its follow-up a little. I’d heard a lot about it, and people seemed to love it… but they’d said the same thing about Bad Wolf. So I was wary.

Okay. I was planning to write about the final episode in my traditional way, from the opening scene to the end, but after a couple of drafts, I realised I couldn’t do that. Not for this episode. This is, for lack of a better word, special. So I’m going for a different approach this time around. Hey, it’s the last one, so why not?

I watched this episode at the end of a one-per-day marathon, from Rose until now. I quickly realised just how different each story was, how different each one felt. No two felt similar to each other. And the ongoing story arc wasn’t the Bad Wolf phenomenon – it was the story of the Doctor and his best friend. Not quite his soulmate. But definitely his best friend. Their first meeting was a whirlwind, involving shop-window dummies, the London Eye, tree-people, metal spiders, gas creatures and Charles Dickens. When Rose eventually got back to her comfort zone, it was a year late… and in the middle of an elaborate alien invasion. When the invaders were defeated, she decided she wanted to come aboard properly… and the Doctor decided he wanted her to.

Their friendship was soon tested when he went a little nuts in Utah, but by the time they got to Satellite Five, one could tell they were having a lot of fun together. Perhaps the audience needed Adam, the companion-who-couldn’t, to come between them, to realise how well they worked together. And look at their rapport in WWII London… once again, they needed someone to come between them, in this case someone who really swept Rose off her feet. But luckily that very same man, Captain Jack Harkness, made a perfect addition to the TARDIS team, as proven on their little Cardiff adventure. Then when each crewmember awoke in a different reality TV show, you could tell they all needed desperately to get back to each other. Not only needed, but wanted to. Because they were friends. And finally, when it seemed Rose had been disintegrated – in front of the Doctor, no less – it was clear that he’d just lost his dearest friend.

Phew! So here we are, and the Doctor’s just discovered Rose is alive after all… only she’s on a Dalek ship. Ah, the Daleks. Yup, they’re back, and they’re mostly digital. But unlike the end of the previous episode, they look fantastic and – most importantly – realistic. The effects team have saved the best for last, with their glorious Dalek ships. But as for the Daleks within the plot… well, I didn’t mind the Daleks discovering religion. Didn’t make me jump for joy, mind you, but it also didn’t make me want to write a nasty letter to the production team. (Unlike those farts, and that pig, and…) I saw it as merely a plot point, in a story that was about far more than that.

The tension in this episode just builds and builds, from the rescue of Rose, to Jack’s gathering of a last defence, to the Doctor tricking Rose and sending her home…. oh! What a scene! Christopher Eccleston has just been incredible in this series – who else could pull off such a defeated look, then immediately mask it with enthusiasm about Rose’s obviously impossible idea about crossing timelines? “He’s tricked her!” I cried out to the screen. My god… I was so involved!

Which brings me to the best part of this episode – the Earth sequence. Imagine looking up at the sky, and knowing a war is taking place somewhere out there, a war that involves your best friend, who’s probably about to die… and you can do absolutely nothing about it. The world just keeps turning, the routine of contemporary life refuses to ever let up. All those little things about your home – your mum, your neighbourhood, your local cafй – once signified your comfort zone, but now they’re more alien than the Moxx of Balhoon. Rose is trapped in a world she no longer belongs to, while the Doctor is about to make a decision that will affect the future of her race. The worlds of 2005 and 200,100 AD have never felt so close together. It’s like they’re happening concurrently… Einstein was right. And to top it all off, there’s a time machine hidden inside a Police Box on her street corner. A living time machine, with a heart. But a heart you can’t break into. This machine is broken to her.

What Rose needs is motivation. She’s got nothing. There’s nothing out there that can help her – except some familiar graffiti. Bad Wolf. A message. A wink from the future. Doesn’t matter who it’s from – it’s proof that she can get back. It’s like in that film Somewhere In Time, when Christopher Reeve discovers his own name in a hotel guestbook from 1912. He was there. So he must be able to get back. So must Rose. All she needed was motivation, see? Oh, and bigger artillery. Like a very big truck with a chain on the end. Hey, that works! Vworp, vworp. And suddenly she’s Super-Rose, full of time-vortex energy, ready to kick Dalek butt.

Now, the resolution. Remember what I said about the “Daleks-finding-religion” plot point being just that, a mere plot point? Well, I feel the same way about the whole Bad Wolf thing. Various people have complained about the deus ex machina resolution to the plot arc. But as I already said, Bad Wolf was not the plot arc. It was just an in-joke. A plot device. And yes, the resolution was a deus ex machina, but what exactly is a deus ex machina? That’s right – a plot device. And just like the Daleks finding God, there were far more important things in this episode than the Bad Wolf thing. I personally enjoyed the whole resolution, anyway. Billie Piper, I’ve finally decided, is wonderful at what she does. I began to well up a little when she described the Doctor as “hers”. I loved the way she nonchalantly wiped out the entire Dalek race with a wave of her arm.

But it’s too much for young Rose, of course. Well, she’s only human! And she’s dying. So the Doctor must save her. With a kiss. A wonderful kiss. I cheered. I really cheered. It just felt right. These two have earned a kiss… especially since the Doctor’s saving her life. (How lovely is that line? “That’s right, I sang a song, and the Daleks ran away.”) But of course, it’s a sacrifice. The Doctor’s now infected. It’s like The Green Mile, isn’t it? But unlike John Coffey, the Doctor can’t just cough out the time vortex. It’s destroying his body. Imagine you’re a casual viewer, and you know nothing about the Doctor Who mythos. “How’s he going to get out of this one?” you wonder. Then, “Is he going to get out of this one?”

Yep. Welcome to the world of Doctor Who. A world that’s only survived for so long because of one thing. Regeneration. This guy can change. And what a regeneration! It’s glorious! A thing of beauty! “You were fantastic,” the Doctor says before he changes. “And you know what? So was I.” But it’s not the Doctor saying this. It’s Christopher Eccleston, the man who saved this show, changed it from a thing of ridicule back to an award-winning Saturday night fixture. And the words were written by that other god, Russell T. Davies. And they’re saying these words to us. Thank you, Chris. Thank you, Russell. You were both fantastic.

And welcome, Mr David Tennant. I just saw Casanova. Wow! I can’t wait to see you in this role!

There’s so much more to this episode I haven’t mentioned… the terrific supporting cast, including Jenna Russell and Jo Joyner… the beautiful death of Captain Jack Harkness (we’ll miss you, Mr Barrowman)… Lynda’s chilling death… the brilliant Dalek Emperor, with Nick Briggs giving another outstanding voice-over performance… the James Bond-like caption in the end credits… the return of old-favourite Dalek lines like “My vision is impaired, I cannot see!”… that heart-rending scene between Rose and her mother, when she tells her she’s met her dead father, thanks to the Doctor… but I’m already onto my fourth page, so I’d better shut up now.

So there we are. Laughs, tears, adventure. A beautiful quasi-love story, with a beginning, a middle, and an end. Great acting, writing, effects, music and direction. And Daleks. Hang on. Am I talking about this episode? Or this entire series? Actually, I’m talking about both. The Parting of the Ways is, for the above reasons, a perfect example of how good this series has been. I’m really going to miss it. Hurry up, Christmas…